The other day I was looking at a marketing platform and the person giving me the demo said – and your “INVESTMENT” would be just $500 per month!

I don’t know about you people, but for $500 per month, this platform would have to sing and dance and serve me breakfast in bed!

After picking up my jaw from the floor (thank goodness this conversation was on the phone) I simply said “Oh” and the sales guy on the other said — “Oh, this will pay for itself in spades.. after you set it up and learn how to use it…


Ummm – yeah — investment my foot!

Let’s Stop Calling Marketing and Investment — at least until it delivers customers

I’ve recently made the decision to stop LYING to myself and others by calling something that costs me money an investment.  If it goes out of my pocket and into someone else’s pocket, it’s an expense.  It costs me money.  It only becomes an investment when it actually starts giving ME money.  There, I’ve said it.

7 Marketing Practices That Can Eat Away Your Profits

I recently published an article over at the WORX site run by my friends at @PayChex that talks about the stupid ways we do marketing give a whole new meaning to the word investment.

You can read the full article over at the Paychex WORX site.: 7 Marketing Practices That Can Eat Away Your Profits but I’m going to have a little fun with it over here.

In the article I say that “Running a Marketing Campaign is Like Running a Marathon”.  How many times have you thrown money at an idea or program or marketing platform as if simply throwing money at it is going to make the difference in your business.  SPENDING money doesn’t give results — WORKING gives results.


The 7 Stupid Ways We Waste Marketing Dollars

In the Paychex version of this article, I’m rather nice – but here, in DIYMarketers, I’m going to tell you straight out —

Selling to Everyone:  You aren’t making money because you’re selling to everyone — Stop DOING THAT.  Find the one person that so sucks and what you do well, that they will cherish you and be happy to pay you money. That pain in the ass customer that is driving you nuts — is NOT your customer.  Would you PLEASE do both of yourselves a favor and just refer them to someone else. You will be happy, they will be happy (or not — who cares) and another awesome ideal customer will now get your time and attention.  It’s a good thing.

Focusing On Demographics Instead of How and Why Your Customers Buy: As marketers we need to stop taking ourselves that seriously.  Get over the demographics and psychographics and really stop, observe and pay attention to people.  When I say “how and why” people buy, I’m talking about what OUTCOME do they want.  What job are they hiring you to do – for what outcome?  If your product is a shovel – they are hiring your product to give them the outcome of a hole.  If you are a funeral home, they aren’t buying a casket — they are buying the outcome of being able to laugh again without feeling sad. It’s not that hard, but it DOES require some quiet thinking and observing.

Diluting Your Efforts Across All Platforms: No, you don’t have to be at every party — just the one that your customers are attending.  It’s actually better to be at a smaller, more intimate party where you get to know people on a deeper level than to be in a giant room with thousands of people where you can’t hear each other talk.  Look for ways to create small ponds of just your ideal customers.

Using Advertising to Buy Customers:  Buying advertising is a lot like buying a treadmill or exercise club membership thinking that it’s the act of buying that will give you results.  It’s the act of DOING that gives results.

When you give an advertiser money, you are actually paying them to take whatever content you give them and distribute it across a platform that they created that reaches whoever they reach.  You are NOT BUYING CUSTOMERS.  The way to buy customers is to know exactly who your ideal customer is, have an offer they can’t refuse and be in relationship with them so that they will choose you.  Advertising can only do this if you have all these elements in place.

Buying Marketing Programs and Coaching You Don’t Use.  Again, just giving someone money doesn’t get results.  Your coach is NOT going to run the marathon for you.  Your coach is NOT going to come up with your branding and run your marketing or your business.  When you buy coaching, your buying a slot of time where you commit to put time, energy and effort to achieve a goal.  This person is your smart, motivating feedback mechanism of a placeholder.


No Follow Up: I love when I see businesses spending money on marketing to get NEW leads and new customers but have no system in place to actually FOLLOW up on business they’ve pitched already.  People to whom you’ve given proposals are READY TO BUY.  No – they won’t call YOU if they want some, they will call your competitor if you don’t follow up.  UUUGH.

Now Go and Waste No More.

So there was your weekend kick in the BUM to spend and yes, invest your marketing dollars and your time wisely.